Author Archives: Margot
Author Archives: Margot
For a long time I’ve held the view that my sense of identity is three-pronged:
It’s a complex topic but I recently questioned the aspect: ‘who I think others think I am’.
“Our only limitations are those we set up in our own minds.” This quote by Napoleon Hill in Think and Grow Rich got me thinking.
My limitations are what I perceive them to be, but … are they real? Yeah, maybe. But sometimes … maybe not. This set me on a train of thought.
It’s very easy to tell myself a story to justify avoiding challenges put before me; in fact, probably any sort of change.
I’ve tried to develop the practice of listening to myself … ‘hearing’ the stories I’m telling myself. It’s funny, but by doing that, I also started noticing that other people do it too. That other people tell themselves stories, make excuses that legitimise them not doing something or other.Read more …
So you think I'm crazy, using a headline like that? Maybe, but I've been reading a couple of great books and they got me thinking ... there are benefits to addiction. These benefits are only attainable if you become addicted and then get over it (as I'm told most people actually do).
In Napoleon Hill's classic novel Think and Grow Rich, he repeatedly says: "Every failure brings with it the seed of an equivalent advantage". You've no doubt heard of the well-used adage that a failure or mistake should be considered a 'learning experience'? Well Napoleon takes that idea to a whole new level. He tells the compelling story of his own son, born without any ears. How do you perceive having a disability, such as having no ears, as bringing an 'equivalent advantage'? Napoleon's son managed to do just that. It was seriously one of the highlights of the book, a jaw-dropping and thought-provoking case study.
While most people who face adversity might say they would rather that it had not happened, they also often say, they have become a better person as a result of the adversity. I'm sure you know what I mean ... that you've heard people say this too? Well, I understand now that they have been able to perceive 'the equivalent advantage' in the crisis they faced. They not only survived but went on to live fulfilled lives.
How does 'finding equivalent advantage' relate to addiction? Well, reading Biology of Desire by Marc Lewis gave me a brilliant idea. Marc, a recovered addict himself, is a professor of developmental psychology as well as a neuroscientist. He argues that addiction is a learned behaviour rather than a disease ... which is what I have always believed. By way of five compelling case studies, Marc demonstrates that the brain changes due to addiction are more normal than abnormal.
The addiction process strengthens those parts of the brain that support the addiction cycle - manifestation of the desire, impulses seeking fulfillment and then brief relief achieved by indulging. Then the neural patterns begin again.
But there is more ...
The recovery process, however, strengthens the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain that controls our judgement and enables us to override impulses and desires for our greater good. There is now documented evidence that recovered addicts, despite the damage temporarily caused by their addiction, greatly enhance their brains in this area! The grey matter that develops as a result of overcoming their addiction puts them in a better position, neurologically speaking than before they ever became addicted!
Wouldn't you call this an 'equivalent advantage'?
Not that I'm advocating you go out and get addicted so that you can develop a super-human prefrontal cortex (judgement capability)! But recovering/recovered addicts can move forward with confidence, converting their difficulties into an 'equivalent advantage'. The whole experience will empower them in all areas of their life. They are/will be stronger, better human beings.
That's an idea worth spreading! Love to hear your thoughts.
I recently had the opportunity to work in a woolshed as a woolhandler (more fondly known as 'rousabout'). Knowing how to throw a fleece is vital. I'm still learning. Sometimes they land nicely, sometimes not.
Right is Sandy Batterham mid-throw. He has good height and it looks to be coming down nicely.Read more ...